I’m thinking it would be helpful for me to explain why this is so freaking hard.
Do you know anyone who has a shellfish allergy? Or is allergic to peanuts or beestings? After their first allergic reaction, they know they have an allergy. The second reaction is stronger and more dangerous. By the third reaction, they had better have an epipen or they could die.
Mold illness has a similar intensification reaction. The difference is that it’s not an allergy ( I have no IgE response to mold) and it usually doesn’t kill you. (It just makes you want to die.)
Basically, you find out the problem is mold, you clean up 90% of the mold, and the last 10 percent makes you just as sick as before. So you clean up 90% of that, and the last 10 percent makes you just as sick as before. It goes on like this literally ad infinitum, since there is no such thing as a mold free location.
So, tinier and tinier amounts of mold, or the chemicals they produce, create these big reactions. It’s crazy making.
Eventually, hopefully, you get to a small enough exposure that your immune system can start to bounce back. But it takes an EXTRAORDINARY amount of work to have that opportunity. It’s like passing through the eye of the needle. I don’t know if I am there yet, but I hope I am close.
That is why I am here in this wilderness area. It has the smallest possible burden on my immune system.
Why haven’t you heard of anyone else going through this? Most people don’t know that mold is a contributing factor in their chronic illness. It underlies chronic fatigue, M/E, Lyme disease, MS, fibromyalgia, and even cancer. But it’s so complex an issue, and the solution is so devastating and radical, that of course any sane person would try half measures and other solutions first. The catch 22 is, however, that the longer you stay and fight to get your life back, the sicker you get and the harder it is to recover. I had this in mind when I ejected from my life. I didn’t want mental sclerosis to be what kept me sick.
I have been struggling with my immune system for decades, making ground by transforming my lifestyle, my food and healthy habits. It is likely that all of my challenges were from mold, and if I can make it through the eye of this needle, I can live in a way that healthier from now on.
I will obviously keep you posted. Thanks for listening.